Wednesday, June 13, 2012

The Power of the Pedestal

Okay.  Strap on your seat belts.  No recipes today.  Or workouts (I got my behind handed to me with descending intervals and weights, I'm good).  No Tri musings (well, kinda).  Just me.  And my thoughts.  About a topic that's been brewing for about a month, okay, a year.
Pedestals.
They are such dangerous objects (and not only because it's National Kitchen Klutzes of America Day- do yourself a favor, go out to dinner or have a sandwich :-P)
Ahem.  Pedestals.  Not only can you fall off them in a literal sense, but you can...of course, be stuck at the bottom of one, looking up.
I think that's happened to all of us-I'll certainly admit it.   Sometimes I get down on myself as a person merely by comparing myself to others, especially when it comes to racing.  It's easy to do....I hang out with faster people, so looking at my PR's sometimes brings me down, especially when those faster people complain about being slow.  Then I remember that there are people that would kill to have my PR's.  Or the ability to run (hell, I would kill for that right now).  Or be happily married (no, I did not write that just for the hubster's sake).
That's all well and good.  I can be content with my size 8 behind, even if my friend wears a 4.  Or my Social Worker paycheck when my neighbor drives a hummer.  Or my 12:50 Ironman PR when my friend just pulled off an 11:30 last year.
That's okay.
But what about when you compare you against you?
That's where I am struggling right now.  Two years ago, I wore a size 6.  I ran a 5 mile race in 37 minutes.    And I could bike hills in Lake Placid without killing myself.
Today...well, here I am.  Celebrating any sub 8 minute mile run (well, that was last month.  Today, I am celebrating the fact that I can (sorta) walk.)  Looking at my swim...my 800 times are, on average, 90 seconds slower (which is alot!).  My clothes (mostly) fit, but I am finding myself raiding the closet for more "forgiving" clothes. 
Ugh.
I know.  Everyone goes through cycles.  I am not on my 140.6 "A" game, fitness wise or weight wise.  And, if I tried to do that every year, I would probably kill myself (literally and figuratively).  It's okay to take a break.  My weight...is where the doctor says it should be.  My fitness...is still better than average.  But the problem is, I'm not comparing me to the average.
I'm comparing me 2012 to me 2009/2010.
And that's kinda rough.
Although....I suppose the grass is always greener.  3 years ago, I lived in a townhouse, and now we own our own home.  I've been promoted at work.  And even though I was a starstruck bride to be in love, now...I have 3 more years into a wonderful marriage with my best friend.  And you can measure that in pounds or seconds per mile.

Such a wise doctor
Who knows.  From what I've heard, stress fractures can turn you into a stronger runner or biker if you treat them right.  So I will.  Now if I could only keep my mitts outta the peanut butter jar....we'd be good :-)
I know it's a "get off the bitter bus and do something about it" type of kick in the pants, but I suppose that everything works in balance.  And I have to remember that.
Ever have a "pedestal problem" with yourself?  How do you deal with it?


gr

1 comment:

  1. Totally know where you're coming from. Although I'm much healthier now than before my accident, I'm slower. I got dropped like a hot rock on a ride last night, by really nice but faster people. It sucks. But we start where we are. Draw on your past, and let it push you forward. Hugs!

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