Friday, October 19, 2012

A Free Pass

Phew.  There are weeks when Friday is a blessing...and then there are weeks when Friday is a freaking necessity.  It's been the latter here.  And at 5pm, I bolted for home...and my jammy jams.  No judging.  You know that street clothes will never.  ever. be as comfortable as pajamas.  Am I right?  Hear hear.
So.  This week.  Conferences, contract writing, travelling or work (and taking the scenic-and long-route back home...ugh...45 extra miles on a 3 hour trip sucks big time).  Add that to a bunch of personal stuff going on and the fact that I've been feeling like poo all week...and I'm ready for some down time.  Literally.  Like...running doesn't even sound appealing right now.  Yeah.  You heard that right.
No worries though.  I'm like a Tigger.  I always bounce back.  It's just been a tough few days.  Weeks.  Okay fine, months.  But I always try to side with the glass half full, even if it's a struggle sometimes.
And I know I'm not the only one who's going through one of life's dips lately.  It seems to be pretty prevalent lately in my little world.
And so, as I drove 400 miles yesterday for work....I got to thinking (road trips are so wonderful in some respects).
We all go through crap in our life.  Sometimes it drags on....sometimes it is more of the isolated little blips that add up.  Sometimes  And we don't feel like it anymore.  And we just want to either a) curl up in a little ball and eat chocolate while watching sappy movies and crying, or b) become depressed and sobby and/or tetchy with everyone we talk to.
I'm guilty of both.  Especially around that time of the month....for one day or so, my poor other half can't do much right.  I also have been known to snap at him and say things I don't mean when life is handing me lemons.
Wait-before I completely brand myself as a bee-you know what....he does the same thing.
We all do.
What I want to talk about it is...the people that do it all the time.  The "free passers" if you will.  Where there's no accountability for their actions or what comes out of their mouth.  Because they "don't say things right".  Or "the client is always right".  Or "everything is wrong in their lives".
Listen.  I have empathy.  Hell yes I do.  I'm a social worker!  But when is enough enough?
Since I am a woman and I have a monthly I allowed to be a complete ass to my husband once a month because I have cramps?  Maybe so.  But I bet he would get awfully damned sick of me.
If I'm broke and on welfare, but decide to spend my food stamps on expensive lobster and run out halfway through the month, should you feel sorry for me because I don't have any food?  (okay, maybe once.  But probably not ongoing, right?)
I'm talking about behavior patterns.  There are some people out there (energy vampires) who seem to suck the life out of you with every word that comes out of their mouth.  Bosses.  Family.  Friends.  Frenemies.  Co-workers.  Acquaintances.
This is no news to anyone-I know there's one more more in everyones world.  The question I have do you deal with them?  When nothing you have to offer is good enough.  When they find fault with everything you do.  And-heres the kicker-if it's a boss or you're related by blood or marriage...and you can't walk away.
I'm flummoxed.  And I'm not the only one.  In the past few months, the hubs, some of my close friends, co-workers, and myself....we've all been struggling with this.  When it's okay for something to fly out of an EV (energy vampires) mouth that is incredibly hurtful....repeatedly....because they (fill in the blank about something that "isn't their fault".)

When I was a kid, we were taught a few things:
1.  If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all.
2.  You can't take back words very easily (written words for sure-but the spoken word is awfully powerful).
3.  You can forgive....but it's much harder to forget.

That is all.  Does anyone have any words of advice for this one?  I know it's out there....what in the hell happened to people being personally accountable for their thoughts and actions?

(and with that said, I'm doing okay....not meant to be a woe is me kind of post!....I just needed to get that out there in the open.  You all know that life is a mix of crap and rainbows....we show both here.)

1 comment:

  1. bad week..sounds like...hopefully after a good nights sleep, you will wake up feeling great and renewed cuz!!!