Cassadagaman 2020: The Amazing Race

Well, THAT escalated quickly.

Like most of my racing stories, this one started rather innocently with some healthy grousing about the lack of 2020 races.  As I've said several times, I'm aware that not being able to race this year has been a first world problem, but I also know that I can, in fact, mourn the loss of "normal" as long as it's in proper perspective.  And as someone that's spent every summer since 2005 with triathlon on the brain (yes, even through my two pregnancies!) 2020 in terms of my "swim, bike, run" play was severely lacking.  I was lucky enough to be able to start training again with some of my buddies - many rides with The Boy, a few with the Banter, and a great training week with the Outlaw.  But. No. Races.

You see where this is going.  Last month, a somewhat local triathlon club/coach put on a sprint and Olympic distance event - I debated signing up, but something stopped me.  Was a COVID race going to be anywhere near the same as a "normal" race?  I had no idea.  I decided against the race.  I found out afterwards it was run rather well and the few people I knew that did it really enjoyed it.  Seed planted.

On August 23rd, I was supposed to be racing in my fourth Ironman, at Mt. Tremblant.  Instead of racing, I met up with the Banter and did a long ride (oddly fitting, as we both were supposed to be "Ironmanning".)  Well, it was supposed to be a long ride. But it's 2020, right??  Instead we had a mechanical at mile 10 and ended up fixing it and sitting in a park for three hours discussing life and then riding home.  I was interested in seeing how I would handle a 50 miler.  Instead, I got some perspective about the rest of my season and of course, life.  (Seriously, how did I get so lucky to have this guy as a friend and coach??)  Post ride, I immediately began thinking about my 2021 goals and how I might get a jump on those...once again, reshuffling my 2020 "season".  That Friday, I met up with my buddy Fred and did the 50 mile ride then. More seeds planted. 

So, the same tri club that put on the sprint and Olympic race in August was doing a Half Ironman on September 5th - the Inaugural "Cassadagaman".  It featured 4000 feet of climbing on the bike (harder than a loop of Placid) and almost 1000 on the run (ditto).  My 50 mile bike that I had just completed had 1700 ft of "climbing".  I had run, um, 13 miles a few times this year.  This was doable, right?

As a precursor to most of my recent bad decisions in life, I immediately called up the Outlaw, who has plenty of experience talking me into horrible ideas.  I ran it by him and he pointed out the cat 4 hills on the course, the timeline, and general idiocy of such a decision to race.  Followed up by, of course, he was in to do it.  Excellent.  So, with five days to spare, we both hit the "register" button and were committed (in more ways than one?)  First race since January 1, which was a 7.5 mile run.  First tri of the season.  A hilly Half Ironman.  What could possibly go wrong?? (So very 2020, no?)

Me and the Outlaw.  Intelligent decisions are not our forte, but we are fun!

With five days notice, I made the quick choice to control what I could: I would gain no benefit whatsoever with any more last minute training.  So I set up a very abbreviated taper, focused on rest, hydration, and nutrition (which in general, I suck at).  Of course, it was the last week of summer and the weekend before my daughter's birthday party, as well as our busiest season at work.  Which means my five days of rest comprised of menu planning for a party of twenty, shopping, gift wrapping, school shopping, and enough Zoom meetings at work to choke a small country (I did ask for a few 3am meetings.  They thought I was kidding.  I...wasn't).  Somehow, it all got done, including last minute snafus with bike brakes and a few training glitches. I managed to pack for the race (why do tris always require enough crap for a week vacation??) , and Friday afternoon I ventured out toward Cassadaga to meet up with the Outlaw and plan my last will and testament do a little course recon.

Packet pick up was super super easy and we checked out the lake first.  Flat, beautiful, and with almost no swims this year, 2000m would not be fast, but it would be fun!  The bike was....uh....yeah.  We drove the two looped course with careful attention to directions (marked well), road quality (meh) and hills.  We felt it was TOTALLY doable until about mile 4 when the WTF settled in.  The hills were pretty gnarly and never ending.  I had some race goals in mind - a 40:00 swim, a 3:15 bike and a 2:00 run - for an overall time of hopefully under 6 hours.  This was by far not anywhere close to my PR of 5:18, but with the elevation and my lack of distance training, seemed maybe doable.  Then we got to the run course.  They say what goes up must come down but I seriously think that adage doesn't apply in Cassadaga.  The 13.1 miles was clearly more like 20 miles (perhaps in 2020 20 is the new 13.1?) and I was quite confident that there were no downhills.  FUN.  But hey, YOLO, and even though we knew we were gonna die, we would go down swinging.

My new boyfriend, Aero.  Clearly I need more of him in my life!

Post course recon, we headed back to the Outlaw's house about an hour away.  I hadn't hung out with him in over a month, so my idea of a fun vacation is to go to PA for a night then do a half Ironman.  I'm not that bright.  But we knew that.  We washed his bike, ate dinner, chatted about all things tri and life, and I tried to steal his cat.  I think it almost worked.  He digresses. Clearly, I'll have to go back to prove my point on this.  

Race morning dawned super early, as always.  I think I slept about two hours and had the weirdest dreams.  We showered, grabbed breakfast, and were on the road by 445, to the race site by 545.  We got body marked (OMG some normalcy....though it was weird to say I was 38....we joked that in 2020, did anyone actually age up??), hit the potty about a dozen times, and fumbled our way through transition set up.  I swear I forgot how to do this, and the whole placed buzzed with nervous, excited energy.  The field was capped at 150 and due to COVID, we had to wear masks but had plenty of bike space!!  We shivered, checked tires, tried to drink Gatorade, caught up with a few friends, then headed to the lake for a quick dip.  Which was a HUGE mistake.  The water felt great and then we were directed out and back to transition for a pre race meeting where we turned to ice cubes.  The outlaw, myself and our buddy Zach joked about doing a relay - Zach swimming, the outlaw biking and me running.  Pity that one fell through, but after a rousing pre race pep talk by the RD (this guy was already awesome in my books - you could see the attention to detail and love for the sport in everything he did.  I met him for 5 minutes the day before and he knew my name already - he also gave a spectacular pre race prep with an athlete guide and youtube videos of the course).  This was the INAUGURAL race and one of the few 70.3's in the country in 2020....holy crap.  We were making history.  IF we survived.

Swim - 33:58 (1:47/100yd)
We hit the water just before 8am in our little spermy caps (dubbed by the Outlaw).  The men went off at 8:00 and the women at 8:03.  Before I knew it, I was treading water, watch poised and we heard GO!  And we were off.  The first few minutes were a bit crazy (I seed myself aggressively, as I can handle the swim scrum) and about 300m in, we started to settle in.  There was one woman right to my right, and we managed to trade leads for most of the swim - swimming right next to her the whole time and for the most part, breathing and arms in sync.  This never happens to me and it was kinda fun tradiing the pull with her - I hoped I wasn't being annoying but it felt awesome.  My watch beeped 500m in, which seemed to take about 5 years and I thought "Holy crap, what the hell am I doing - how am I going to last 70.3 miles???  I'm not trained for this".  Then I told my brain to shut up and enjoyed the water.  The rest of the swim was pretty uneventful - it was pretty seaweedy (spa experience) and about halfway through I remembered that I forgot to set my garmin varia and made a note to do so in T1.  I peed about four times (sorry) and before I knew it, I spotted the swim exit.  Hit the mat in 33:58 (OMG WHAT?) and realized quickly the swim was a bit short - but I smashed my goal of 40:00 and I started to think maybe I could pull off this sub 6 (uh, cause this was TOTALLY the time to decide that with five plus hours to go) as I headed for my bike!

Bike: 3:20:12 (16.8 mph)
I'll definitely admit my transitions suffered with lack of racing!  I felt slightly drunk as I grabbed all my bike crap, thankfully remembered to turn on my Garmin varia (car detector) and then stuck my feet in my bike shoes, to find out I had left hair ties in them.  Oops.  That wouldn't be fun for 3 hours!  Shook em out, ran my bike to the mount line, and was off!  

I noticed right away I had water in my left ear, so I shook it out....no go.  Eff.  This made hearing cars interesting, but luckily I have a little detector that beeps when one passes, so it was all good.  I felt a little off, but I laughed to myself and said, welp, maybe this is your issue on the bike!  I can handle that.  The first 5 miles passed rather quickly - I drank, slammed a gel, and kept mind to spin out at 85 rpms as much as possible.  With the rolling hills that made for a LOT of shifting, but since I've spent plenty of time working on just that, I felt good.  We hit the first hill about mile 5 and as I ascended I thought...well, this isn't too bad.  I selected an easier gear (YES IN THE SMALL CHAIN RING) and spun up as I heard.....gunshots? in the background.  OMFG.  Hunters on the course?  I was legit freaked out and then talked myself into a positive light....hey, just gotta get out of here quicker!  The last part of the uphill was a left turn that was unmanned and very gravelly, so I took it easy and then geared down for a nice speedy descent.

Except...holy hell.  In my quest to survive the uphills, I forgot I would have some speedy descents!  My coach warned me yesterday and brought up my lack of balls descending skills on the bike, and it bit me in the butt here.  I feathered the brakes a bit, hit 46 instead of 55, and was back on the road.  I was passed by a few people here and then gained back on them on the next flats and hills.  One rider from the Cleveland Tri club who I dubbed "Cleveland" cause I'm clever like that, leapfrogged with me the whole bike - we would yell out CLEVELAND! or ROCHESTER! as we passed each other (I later found out she was the woman I swam with, and she loved it - we are now Facebook BFF's and probably will announce our wedding next year :-P)

The next 5-6 miles were pretty uneventful, except for a small downhill where a deer ran out in front of me and scared the crap out of me - I knew where there is one deer, there are usually more, so I slowed and thankfully had no Bambi crashes.  Then we hit the big hill.  Holy mother of anything I have ever climbed.  I tried in vain to find a smaller gear.  No luck.  At this point, the rain (WHAT RAIN) hit, and continued for the next hour.  This cooled us off and wasn't an issue on the uphill, but the twisty downhill portion was another story, and while I wasn't white knuckling, I certainly gave away some speed in my lack of descending skill in the rain.  The last major hill of the loop (the course was a 2 looper - 28 miles each) was on a four lane highway, where I was SUPER glad to have my varia.  Traffic was actually pretty decent for a Saturday morning and this road had plenty of Semis.  Finished loop one in just under 1:40 and I realized my 3:15 bike split was a little iffy.  I took the first loop really easy, but without a doubt this was a much harder course than Placid (and later verified by the pro that did it as the hardest 70.3 she had ever done).  

Loop two was pretty uneventful save for the end of the rain and the beginning of the winds.  There were pretty decent winds at about 15 mph that never ended up being tailwinds, and a few gusts that blew me all over the road.  Thankfully, again having a device that alerted me to cars was a lifesaver, and I remembered to "play" with the wind a bit.  Nonetheless, I didn't descend very well with a crosswind, and need to work on that.  I'm also quite confident the RD inflated the hills the second time around (such a party trick!) and I debated getting off my GD bike and walking the big hill.  But, I'm stubborn ....errrr....tough.  So I gutted it out.  I took care to drink and to take in nutrition, and will say that I have never fueled so well in a race or shifted as well, either.  My legs felt the hills, but I cruised into T2 with a 3:20 bike split after 4000 feet of climbing and basically covering all the seasons in one ride.  Hey, its 2020 right?  I dismounted my bike without incident (I actually got a compliment on my smooth dismount, which, frankly, I would like in writing next time, as we know my history of falling on my ass in T2)....and headed out for my FAVORITE part, the run! 

Run: 1:56:59 (8:48)

I saw my buddy Cleveland as I headed out to the course and we fist bumped.  I knew how hilly this course was so my plan was to average 9 minute miles for a 2 hour run split - to walk the uphills and run the flats and downs.  I took off at an easy pace and found another member of the Cleveland Tri club about a quarter mile in - she told me I was her "Beacon of Light" on the bike with my varia, and we talked about how cool they were and how much fun this race was, even with the hills.  She urged me on and since my pace was a bit faster, I went with it, wishing her luck.  Hit mile 1 in 8:48 which seemed about right, and with aid stations every mile, I decided to do water at each station and go for a gel every half hour or so.  My stomach was feeling good and legs not too bad!  I checked my watch and saw that a 2:01 run split would keep me under 6 hours, but there was no sense in projecting anything until at least mile 7, so I shelved that and went off effort.  

I came across a runner about a mile and a half in that looked legit like he was dancing down the course - he ran on his toes and made it look effortless.  We chatted for a minute or two and I told him how awesome he looked - since the course was three out and backs (all different branches) we saw each other six times and the name "Twinkle Toes" stuck.  I managed miles 2-4 at about an 8 minute mile - probably too fast but stuck to my run/walk really well from mile 2 on.  I counted three women in front of me and was gobsmacked to be in 4th place - WHAT??  They were all pretty far ahead of me so I had no ideas of snagging third, but it definitely reminded me that with a sick bike split, I would be in contention.  2021 goals, baby.  I'm working on it!

At mile 5, the massive hills hit.  There were a few women behind me that were definitely ones that could catch me, but I ran my own race - joked with the volunteers about possibly knocking down some hills, power walked the steep parts, and kept in a steady flow of water and gu. I joked with anyone that would talk to me, and made a bunch of new friends on the course.  I was told countless times how happy I looked (yeah, I know, that's about right) but I was struck by how freaking lucky I was to be out there - even though this course played to none of my strengths, I was not trained for it, and I hurt - I was so. damned. lucky. to be out here, doing what I love.  And I just kept grinning like a silly girl.  I didn't care.  This was what it was all about.

The next 5 miles averaged about an 8:45-9:00 mile, save for a huge hill at mile 8, and then mile 11 as well.  I got passed by one woman here - the only person that passed me on the run.  With two miles to go, I was sitting at 5:35 and I figured a sub 6 was totally in the bag.  I kicked it in for the last mile, passed the final aid station who called out I was 5th and looked "Frickin fabulous!" and to go catch the boys.  Well, sure.  I can do that.  Hit mile 13 in 1:53 and realized the course was kinda long, but hey, extra mileage for my dollars!  I sped up and saw the Outlaw ahead who yelled out "RAE, when are you gonna RUN???"  Eff you, Outlaw, I'm running a 6 minute mile.  I flipped him the bird (yes, we got this on video) and ran it in for a 5:55:42 finish!

Post Race

Post race I caught up with my buddies, new and old.  The Outlaw crushed his goal and came in at 4:52:xx and told me all about his splits (calm down, buddy, let me breathe LOL).  I gave him a GIANT hug as he came in 4th overall!  Our buddy Zach came in under 7 hours, which was also his goal!

While I missed the podium, I came in 5th woman and the Outlaw and I both won our Age Groups - sweet!  I chatted with the Cleveland Tri Club (I think I'm an honorary member now) hung out for awards, snarfed a cheeseburger, and headed home.  

While I had a few thoughts about things I could have done better (descending, aero) overall I am super pleased with this race.  MY twelve day triathlon season of 2020 was a success!  My two goals were to go under 6 hours at a tough course and not be able to walk the next day.  Both achieved.  Winning.  The outlaw and I joked that we must be on a 2020 race streak, as we both raced New Year's day and then now. Apparently that means I'm in for two more half marathons and a half Ironman.  Well....we will see :-)

As far as Cassadagaman, I will say, hands down, this was an amazing race.  It featured every element you could imagine, with every kind of weather.  The course was gorgeous, the people friendly, the RD amazing.  I also hands down endorse any race run by Mark Wilson, the RD.  His love and excitement is infectious (can we even say that during a pandemic???) and he gave me something I won't forget....a beacon of hope in 2020.  A small moment of "normal".  A chance to swim, bike, run and play with my friends.  A MUCH needed stress relief.  And all in one weekend.  THANK YOU!

You Spin Me Right Round

I have no idea why I even pretend any more.  

Whenever I find some really fantastic success that makes me feel all big and bad as an athlete, I get super excited and make a note to write a post.  I'm sure these (as few and far between as they are) are super appreciated by everyone.

WAY more often....I post about how I fall on my ass and attempt to get up (literally or figuratively.  Take your pick).  Somehow, these posts get way more traction and responses - apparently everyone loves hot mess Rae - whether you relate or I make you feel better about yourself, hey, I'm really glad to help!

So, let's keep em coming!

For everyone that appreciated my podcast or bike saga part eleventy billion, here's another gem for you.  I've explained how this year I've been getting back to basics on the bike. No more playing like I actually can ride.....I can't.  Time to stop bullshitting and fix it.  I've been going out to ride 4-5 times a week, whether it be a legit workout or more of a chill, skill building ride.  This has been allowing me to work on some bike speed, but more so taking a back seat to power improvement and work on becoming "one" with my bike.  

New race kit?

So, let's review, to date, my current bike race strategy "goals" for every race I've done since 2005:

1.  Not crashing or seriously maiming myself

2.  Not DNFing in the process

3. Finishing as quickly as my legs and mental idiocy allows

2021 deserves way better.  Way, way better.  While mulling over all the things I need to work on, I talked it over with a friend, who (join the party, bro) is as ever confused about my idiot mental block.  He fondly recalled the first day he got aero bars on his bike and immediately went out to play around with them....and never looked back.  As I was explaining how this blew my mind, the both of us may as well have been speaking foreign languages to each other. How I envy that ease it must be to just....enjoy the damned bike ride.  Man, that sounds fun.  And it got me thinking..... I wish I could be that way....I wanna be a bike centaur.  Half woman, half bike, with the two simpatico.   

 It's not that I don't want to be better on the bike....I really, really do.  But think about the thing that terrifies you the most.  Then you get it. That's exactly how I feel every time I ride.

I went for en easy ride this morning, and started to think about some of the things that I spend real time worrying about that.....most athletes likely never even give a thought to while on the bike.  In case you want a glimpse into the hot mess that is me....In no particular order, here are a bunch of things spinning around in my mind for 99% of the ride....(and this is just in a 60 minute ride!!)

1.  Keeping my bike in a straight line...its NOT like riding a car.  Not at all.  

2.  Avoiding the branch or pothole ahead  if there's a car back...do I go into the road?  Risk a flat?  FUCK!

3.  Small Chain ring shifting.  This is a horrible experience that will either make me crash, drop a chain, or both.  Its a total disaster waiting to happen. I just won't do it.  

4.  Big chain ring shifting for a small hill...whats the point??  (I am getting better at this.  But I give it real consideration before wasting the effort that might make me swerve)

5.  How to take my left hand off without crashing my bike. One handed???  WHAT??

6.  What if the car behind me is pulling a trailer and doesn't realize its wider than they are??? OMFG what if there's no shoulder what do I do (This is horrible on Lake Rd)

7.  Yay!  I shifted.  Fuck, that shift sounded weird.  Why is it sticking?  Why didn't the bike actually shift??? If I mess with it, will I end up all over the road??  Probably.  Awesome.  Now my bike is grinding.  Right.  I wont shift again.  Ever. That's much smarter.

8.  My nose itches.  Should I scratch it or should I just leave it for the next ten miles so I don't have to ride one handed? Yeah....I'll do that.  Nose itches - mental HTFU!

9.  Shit, I have to right turn.  Should I hand signal?  Can I do that without dying?

10.  Shit, now I have to turn.  I know I should bend my right knee into the turn but what if I fall over?? I'll just go super slow and brake through it all.

11.  Shit, I have to left turn.  Yeah, I can't signal for that.

12.  Shit, now I have to look over my shoulder before left turning four hundred times to quadruple check that there are no cars a half mile back so I can get into the road.  Its windy.  I cant hear shit.  

13.  Shit, what if I have to stop?? This is not good.  I'll pray there are no cars.  Or ride 2mph to wait them out. Yep.  Maybe that'll help. Hopefully I won't tip over.

14.  I've been riding for 15 miles and my left hand is totally numb.  How am I going to finish this ride?  What if I have to brake?  Crap. I literally can't even feel it.  This is not good.

15.  OMG - my hydro aero straw isn't working and/or is totally out of my reach to grab without using my hands.  FUCK.  Guess I'm not drinking during this ride! It's a 30 mile ride?  Well hot damn.  That's gotta be some sort of race prep strategy right?  RIGHT???

15.  Dropping into aero....oh hell no.  How do I steer with my elbows? I'm wobbly. 

16....what if a car comes and I need to move out of the way while in aero??

17....what if there's a pothole and i need to actually steer in aero to avoid it???

18....what if.....OMG.  just...no. Fuck aero. I'm riding the hoods.

19.  Shifting while going fast.....or downhill....OMG how do I take a hand off to accomplish this???? I'm going 30mph!  I'll DIE!!

20.  How in the hell do I eat one handed on the bike?  Fuck it.  I'll just pour in more tailwind. I needed to drop a few to get to race weight.

21. What is the air force velocity of an unladen swallow??  (IDK.  We needed SOME humor here.)

Wow.  That's ridiculous.

BUT.....lest you think there is no hope, I think there might be.  Here are a few things I don't think about as of this year, as a direct result of screwing on my balls and just. fucking. riding. 

1.  Clipping in with relative ease...I don't sit there for 10 minutes hoping I can take off without crashing.  (Well, I thought I had that one till I rode last weekend with my two best friends.  Yep.  I totally planted 15 miles in.  No.  I don't wanna talk about it).

2.  Shifting in the big chain ring while doing a small hill or downhill that's a decent length.  (I used to ride my 17 mile Lake Rd loop in one gear.  I didn't stutter).

3.  Riding next to someone without freaking out or making them ride in front of me.  Sometimes I even pull or ride on the outside.  I often can have a conversation while riding.  This is supposed to be fun....I'm getting there!

4.  looking up and enjoying the scenery - did you know that there is pretty awesome scenery in the finger lakes/Lake rd/WNY?  It's gorgeous! (Yep.  That was sarcasm).

5. Drinking from my torpedo without thinking about it too much.  (Sometimes I miss.  Apparently this is funny, but hey, I'm trying.  I used to wait for the perfect second to drink....now I drink...when I'm thirsty.  What a concept).

6.  Switching on my bike computer or off while riding.  I used to start it in my driveway and stop it after I stopped.  Now I do so while coasting down or up my road.  Yep.  Riding one handed.  I'm a badass.

7.  Passing someone riding that's slower than me in a road that's open to traffic.

8.  Navigating potholes and tree branches when there's no traffic..i.e., um steering my bike.  At least on Lake Rd where I know all the potholes. 

9.  Standing climbs.

10.  Controlled stops that I know are coming with plenty of room (I really can dismount when I know it's coming up.  It's not a flying dismount or even a pretty one, but it works). 

11.  The concept of pedaling when cars pass me (unless its one with a scary trailer that's about 25 feet wide, which there were approximately 20 of in my one hour ride today. WTF)

12.  Riding in wind (gusts of 30 mph are still scary, but not I'm gonna cry and throw up scary).  I've learned to handle 10-15 mph winds with minimal cursing and not fighting it.  

13.  Pitched camber roads (Holt Rd used to terrify me to ride on for this reason and I thought I was gonna tip over every time I rode).  

14.  Riding with my hands poised over the brakes every. second.   I actually let go most of the time rather than thinking I need to stop every single second.

15.  Descending without braking.  Sometimes I even shift into the right gear so I go faster.  What??

16.  The sheer terror of the thought of getting on the bike....sometimes it's even fun (I know...who knew??)

So.  Now you know more about the crazy brain of Rae and her bike.  And you know what they say about that, right?

Go, Joe! Sorry, I'm a child of the 80's.  I can't help it.

And the epic journey continues.....

C'Mon and Ride It (The Train...errr... Bike)

Well, the jig is up.  Despite my insistence to be a bumbling around mess of an athlete, I somehow managed to come across as slightly bad ass, landing myself on a certified podcast.  Northeast Athlete, a podcast dedicated to exploring local athletes across the Northeastern United States likely needed some comic relief for their listeners sought me out as an accomplished, experienced athlete for one of their episodes!  I know.  I was a little concerned by their definitions, as well. But hey, I'll act like a fool on camera for anything, so I readily agreed!

If you've been a long time reader, most of this won't be news, but if you've got an hour to kill, check it out !  Jacob, the guy that interviewed me, spent quite a bit of time asking about my training tips regarding running, swimming, (HAH!) and biking (double hah!).  I gave him the best answers I had, which might be useful to approximately two people (you're welcome) and humorous to the rest of you.

Needless to say, the poor guy was probably looking for something more insightful regarding my three favorite bike workouts than what he got....(Spoiler alert!)

1.  The one where I don't crash

2.  The one where I don't have to stop

3.  The one where I don't have to shift or ride in Aero.

Cripes, Rae.  Get it together.  This fear of the bike thing has been way overblown.  WAY overblown. And while 2020 certainly hasn't been the year to chase dreams in terms of PR's (you need races for that!), it really has been a year to step back and get back to basics.  For me, it was the bike.  Earlier on this summer, I was so darn proud of myself  of getting out to ride my bike twice a week (NOT ON THE TRAINER!!) , while keeping my sanity and running almost every day.  Really, I was killing it.  C'mon, look at me, riding my bike!  Outside!

Right.  During one of the conversations I had with my *pseudo* (only dubbed as such cause he's letting me do my own thing until it's time for Ironman training) coach, amidst all my self congratulating on these amazing 10 mile rides twice a week, he bluntly asked me when I was going to stop playing and work my weaknesses for real.

Dumbfounded, I told him that was EXACTLY what I was DOING.....HELLO! (was he not paying attention??)  He paused for a minute (why does this man put up with me??) and carefully replied "Since when does doing something twice a week make any significant change?"

Mic drop.  What perfect sense.  I was, as usual, going around in my little Rae world, working what I liked to best and avoiding the scary bike in the corner.  Dammit.  I both love and hate it when he's right (which is usually the case).

So I made the most intelligent decision at the time and showered him with legit reasons excuses as to why I couldn't bike more.  I don't ride more.... because it takes more time to get ready.  Duh.  It is so NOT the fear of riding.  NOT the cars.  NOT the fact that Webster is windier than Kansas in a tornado (it's not, I'm prone to hyperbole).  NOT the fact that my legs were tired.  NOT. 

Running....I posited....took 2 minutes to prep.  Shoes.  Shorts.  Bra. Visor.  Hit start on the garmin.  GO!

So he casually asked me how long it took for me to get ready to go for a ride.  I replied....at least twenty minutes.

Now it was his turn for a jaw drop.  No way, he countered.  Takes me...2 minutes.  And with that, I laughed.  Alright, I said....lets put this one to a test.  You prep your ride, I'll prep mine, let's write down the steps and time it takes and we will compare.

So, with SCIENCE on the line, we conducted an oh so well executed "experiment" of how long it takes to get ready to ride a bike.

Ride one involved a prep time for the Banter (AKA the coach)  of 5 minutes and 40 seconds (he posits there was some sort of spousal white knighting that made it take longer, but whatever).  His easy steps:

1.  Change clothes

2.  Pee

3.  Start Garmin up to locate satellites

4.  Get water

5.  Pump up tires (every other ride)

6.  Go

Simple enough, right?  This assumes all ride gear is good to go (usually is for me too) and we haven't ridden in a few days (or step five might not be necessary - which I digress, I always check, but this is his set of steps, not mine, so we will let it be).  

Ride one for our hero Pants (yep, that's me) clocked in at a 24 minute prep.  This again, assumes normal behavior.  Here are my easy steps to go on a bike ride:

1.  Check the weather

2.  Check windy.com to see which way the wind is blowing

3.  Debate if the weather is perfect enough for a ride.  I see there is a 5% chance of rain three hours out.  Seems risky.

4.  Ditto for windy.com.  ESE winds of 8mph seems kinda dangerous to me.  (It's not). 

5.  Get bike off trainer.  

6.  Clean hands from copious amounts of grease accumulated from step 5.

7.  Change bike wheel

8. Bring bike upstairs

9.  Pump up tires

10.  Turn on bike computer

11.  Check power meter.  Re calibrate (yes, every ride).

12. Check brakes...back and front.  

13.  Add enough water to both bike hydration bottles to provide for possible trip to Africa.

14.  Change into bike kit

15.  Get ID, money, snacks, and the kitchen sink just in case I need it.  

16.  Realize said packed "just in case" stuff does not fit in jersey pockets.  Change.

17.  Sunscreen up (lube is for wussies)

18.  Helmet and bike shoes on

19.  Braid or low pony tail hair.

20.  pee

21.  Wipe down glasses so they don't fog

22.  Double check weather and windy.com in case the forecast or radar or wind changed in 17 minutes.  It hasn't.

23.  Double check brakes in case they failed in 12 minutes.  They haven't

24.  Lock door and wheel bike out

25.  Mount bike.  Pray.

26.  Look both ways for cars

27.  Pray again.  Quell stomach queasiness and deep breathe to get heart rate down and debate a quick run to the store.  We are totally out of canned black beans and there could be an emergency need.

28.  Debate peeing again

29.  Curse and turn on bike computer

30.  Look both ways for cars again.....check 3 miles in each direction to ensure there are no cars ANYWHERE in New York State on the road (can Cuomo fix that for me?)

31.  Heave a big sigh, clip in, roll out and try not to fall while clipping in to my second pedal.

31 easy steps, right?  My first attempt, I was out the door in 24 minutes, which means I'm either damned efficient with that many steps (woot, multi tasking!) or...um....we had a big problem.

Ever the problem solver, I turned to my trusty group of training buddies.  I surveyed five of the guys I ride with, including the husband.  Once we established that ride prep did not include pooping (which adds 15 minutes, did you know that??) they all came back at about 10 minutes of prep, averaged together.  This told me two things.

1.  My coach is not human (I knew this).

2.  I had some work to do.....

I vowed to do two things.  One being to get my damned self on the bike five days a week, cause if I wanted to be a bike beast, I clearly needed to C'mon and Ride it!  (The bike).  More rides = more efficient prep time and less freak out time (theoretically).  And two, to time myself for the first week to see how close I could get to the Average Joe...or Greg...or Matt time....OR how close I could get to the super human banter bike prep time.  It was so on.

Ride 2 - Out the door in 14 minutes.  I chose the right outfit, checked weather once, and cut out steps 5-8 and 26- 28.

Ride 3 - Out the door in 6 minutes!  6!!!  This one, I didn't check the weather at all.  I also brought one water bottle, had my bike already in the garage good to go, and cut out steps 5-8, and 26-30 - including forgetting to turn on my damned computer.  Whoops. 

Ride 4:  4 MINUTES!  4!!!  I was so excited about this prep  I forgot to be nervous!!  I have no idea how I accomplished this one, but with this feat, I had proved my point to myself and was now done with the experiment.  I doubt I'll ever get down to the mythical "2 minutes" but this was a sound stopping point. 

The point of this is....you can have an excuse for anything.  And if you want it bad enough....your desire has to outweigh your fear.  It did.  With that, I vowed to keep at it, riding 4-5 times per week.

I started this experiment about a month ago - I'm pleased to say that in the last 30 days, I've ridden my bike twenty one times.  That's probably more outdoor rides than I did in all of 2019, save for races.

One small car back on track for the train wreck that is my bike, right?  

I think I can, I think I can...

266 Miles for Cystic Fibrosis: Running for a Cure

This is one of those posts, guys.  It ranks right up there with my first Ironman...My first Ultra....My first tri.  You start to write it a few times but you can't find the right words.  You want to convey the sheer magnitude of the experience you just had but the written word cannot in any way, shape or form, do justice to the feelings you have about it.  So I'll do my best.

2020 has been hard.  So, so hard.  And I know I'm nowhere near alone when I say that.  We have had our ups and downs, and the downs have been low, low downs.  Everyone has felt it to some degree, so this is not news.  I hit my lowest low a few weeks back.  There were a few days at the end of June where I actually could not get out of bed.  I thought I was sick, but was afraid to say anything to anyone.  My stomach hurt.  I couldn't eat.  And walking to the bathroom was a task that was insurmountable.  You get the gist.

2020 - "gently rolling hills"

Coming out of it, I got stronger every day, and had to be thoughtful of how to expend my energy so I didn't slide back into the hole I was in.  It was not an easy climb back.  I had to let go of certain things I clung to.  To accept things that I didn't have the energy to address or change, and to focus on what was most important in my life in the world that we currently live in.  As the days went by, I began to realize that the "sick" I had was a hitting of the wall with life - my stress had compounded so much with work, my family, my friends, my training and my environment that my body said ENOUGH!  and forced me to rest.  It was eye opening.  Coming out of it, I knew that I could, in fact, use the experience to become a better version of me.  I'm taking my time with this one, and of course I will have some thoughts along the way, but, as always, it comes with quite a few steps and a shift of my mindset.  Growth.  It's a scary, wonderful thing.

I preface my post with this because it really sets the stage for my experience.  I want to call this a race report, but it wasn't a race.  Or maybe it was?  You decide.  This past Friday, I travelled down to Cattaraugus County, NY, to be part of something amazing.  My friend Bradley Poole (well, I had met him once, but we are now BFFs, I'm confident) is a CF warrior.  What's CF?  Cystic Fibrosis, a rare genetic disease, produces mucus within the lungs and other organs in the body.  It's a rare genetic disease, and is fatal.  There is no cure, and the study to find one is severely underfunded.  Bradley has this disease, and I am a carrier for it.  He is 32 years old and has accomplished feats that no one with CF should logically be able to accomplish - he is a fantastic trainer, motivator, and holds a 1:34 half marathon PR (I know.  I need to work harder).  All in all, he is an amazing example of what it takes to NEVER GIVE UP.  (You're gonna want to donate even more when I finish this post, but in case you are inspired RIGHT now - https://passion.cff.org/runforacure).

As part of his quest to raise money to find a cure and inspire those with CF to live their life to the fullest, he, along with his sister Lauren (who is totally my sista from another mista) devised a fundraiser to run EVERY town in their county.  That's 7 days, 266 miles, roughly 38-42 miles of running per day.  Wow.  I eagerly signed up to pace him for 42 miles on the 6th day of the challenge, figuring my (limited) experience with ultras might in someway assist him.  I was so, so excited to be part of this.

As the week of the challenge arrived, we figured out his goal pace (10-12 minute miles)...and then....life hit.  The weather was predicted to be in the nineties all week, with the heat index over a hundred.  I was getting over being sick.  He figured out the first day that not only is Cat county hilly AF, but your pace for an ultra....especially a multi day one....needs to be flexible.  He tweaked his schedule and did the runs in two parts, one starting at 7am, one starting at 7pm.  I revised my pacing and decided to do the first 21 with him and then hand it off to a PM pacer.  Sensible. (Maybe?).  The morning of, I had my normal bagel and gatorade and packed for a 5 hour run - his morning runs had been about that long for 20 miles.  Into my camelbak went water, a pack of chomps, 2 gus, some peanuts for salt, gum, and emergency aquaphor.  I drove down to Alleghany, which was two hours away.  At 6:45am, the weather was a balmy 75 degrees with a projected high of 95.  Yowtch.

I met up with a small group of runners that turned out to be a mix of Brad's friends and people that didn't even know him.  One was a woman that read about him in the paper whose son battled anxiety.  One was a high school principal of a town we were running through.  Some were members of the local running club that wanted to lend their support.  Others co- workers, people he trains, and his wfie's co-workers. Their goals ranged from following for 2 miles to ten, and everyone knew we were going to be part of something great.  "Forrest" (as we oh so originally called him) showed up right at 7 and after a few photos and jokes, we were off!

The pace started out at an eleven minute mile of easy running.  Chris, a co-worker of Brad's wife, served as my co-pacer for the first 12 miles and she, Brad and I developed an easy rapport right from the beginning.  We chatted with Brad about his goals (run the flats, walk the hills) and I gave him his mile splits, which he asked for and said he found helpful.  We started out pretty quickly with the bad dad jokes (What do sprinters eat for breakfast?  Nothing....They Fast!) and kept up a decent stream of chatter for the first few miles.
About 3 miles in, our first 5k group peeled off and we hit an "aid station", which was filled with awesome supporters, water balloons, and ice!  Score.  I had elected to wear my camelbak and it began to rub, so I hit it up with aquaphor, ate some peanuts, and played with my new husky dog friendo (hint, greg, hint!)  We took off after a photo op and three members of the local fire department joined our entourage.  About mile 6 we were back on the roads and managed to get ourselves a fine lead vehicle (Thank you Deb!) and a police escort (Thank you Devine!), along with Brad's wife, Steph, who carried the SAG vehicle (she was AMAZING).  This parade of vehicles stayed with us for the whole 42 miles of the day, which was just unreal.  If I would have known, I would have thrown a change of clothes and my cooler in a car (this would totally bite me later, but live and learn), but it was super awesome to have an entourage - and Deb doubled as our photographer - she averaged at least 200 pictures per day, and was our map reader, cheerleader, and literal driver of the bus!

Around mile 6, we got sillier than normal and Chris and I started singing to Brad (this poor man).  We sang a little Def Leppard (my forte) and some Bon Jovi, eventually ditching the words to "Halfway There", as Brad was, in fact, way more than half way to his goal.  I give you the new chorus:


"Ohhhh!  We're 80% there!
Ohhh ohhh! I wish I had cold air!
Take my foot, it don't smell I sweearrr
Ohhh oh! Where's the cold air?"

Yep.  It was like that.  I'm a ball of cheese and I'd feel bad about it, but I got him to laugh through the pain, so thanks, I'll be here all day (foreshadowing, anyone?)

It was also at about this point that we developed our first grand idea of the day.  Brad confessed to us that after 5 days of running he had lost 15 pounds and we joked that it was a great dieting strategy (disclaimer - it's not, and we know it, and we were joking) but over the next few miles we developed our new marketing tool - the 2-6-6 diet!

Only 2 runs a day for 6 days, for 6 miles (plus 260) total! (266!)

your results may vary.  Do not try this at home. 

Somehow this seemed totally hilarious at the time, and after day 7 Brad lost 20 pounds total and might have to revise his plan.  Don't worry buddy, I'm still available for consults!

Teegan, Brad and I, hitting the first major hill

Mile 8 changed the tone for the day.  We were still averaging about an 11:30 mile and picked up two new running mates - Teegan and Trae.  Teagan is a 12 year old child warrior who battles CF and is one of the top wrestlers in the state.  She began wrestling at age 4, which blows my mind.  She, her brother, and her Dad became part of our entourage, and these two kids just blew me away with their can do and amazing attitude toward life.   These guys joined us for the next 6 miles, and this is when we started hitting the major hills.  I joked about hiring a bulldozer the night before to flatten the hills, and about 2 miles into them, realized I needed to fire them immediately (THEY HAD ONE JOB TO DO!) Our morning buddy, Chris, peeled off here (don't worry, we are totally besties now, she texted me bad dad jokes all afternoon for the cause, and is one of the new amazing friends I have from this day!).  The first major hill, about mile 10, was at least a mile long and totally unrunnable.  The second stretched at least 2 miles long and Brad kept us going strong here - at this point, it was about 93 out and the pavement was well over 100.  We were running up these hills at a steady 11-12 minute mile and I was just in awe of this man.  Any thought I had of stopping would have been laughable.

At mile 13, we came to the intersection of a new town and stopped for water, a balloon launch in CF colors (purple) and a few words with the local paper, which my backside made.  (They clearly knew my best shot LOL).

With the first half marathon down, it was off for more fun, more water spray, more cheering, and then miles and miles of desolate country.  We had a new runner join us, Trina, who was an awesome cheerleader and we hit it off immediately.  We spent the next 6 miles or so trading spots next to Brad and talking him through one mile at a time.  At this point, we found out that Teegan's Aunt lived on the course at mile 21 and we made plans to stop for the morning there.  It was where I planned to unload, until I found out that Brad's third pacer for the day might or might not make it.  Trina and her husband, JD, planned to do as much of the back stretch as possible, but with it being as hot as it was and with Brad's condition (he began to question a stress fracture at this point) I decided I would stay with him as long as I could stand it.  I had a bail out option at 1pm, 5pm, or Steph offered to drive me back to my car at the end.  I ditched my camelbak about mile 15, as it had rubbed the spot of a silver dollar totally raw, and gave it to Deb to SAG.  We finished the morning stint super strong, and did the first 21 miles in 4:15 total moving time, a 11:35 pace, which was his fastest morning yet of the week!


Our lunch stop was nothing short of gourmet.  Teegan's Aunt, Deena, had a pool and we jumped in fully clothed.  We feasted on Peanut butter and fluff sandwiches (OMG SO GOOD), popsicles, and cheese puffs.  I aired out my shoes and shirt.  Aquaphored.  And sat down and chatted with Brad, Steph, Deb, Devine, and Teegan's Dad, Shane.  Their stories blew me away.  They shared their life experiences and opened up 100% to a complete stranger.  My feet hurt, I was warm, and I wasn't feeling awesome, but being part of this day took all of that away, and a feeling of peace and grace took over at this point that would remain the rest of the day.  It was indescribable to be part of something this amazing and I knew I wanted to soak up every minute.

We headed out for the second 21 miles about 3pm, and the day was just brutal.  It was easily 95.  Brad donned his new "umbrella hat" that his wife (oh, did I mention she's 7 months pregnant?) got with a diaper purchase, and we joked about his modeling for the company for when you get "the runs".  At this point, a new runner, JD (Trina's husband) became our third, and we started out with the goal of run half a mile, then quarter mile walk.  We bid Deena goodbye (what an awesome woman!) and headed out, with Deb at the lead, Devine in his cop car, and Steph trailing the parade.  The first 3 miles were pretty great, then we realized that the 1300 feet elevation gain we had in the first 21 miles was merely a warm up for the PM hills.

The hills came fast and furious, and the day got even hotter.  We were in the middle of complete desolation, and as we trekked through dirt roads in the country we began to wonder what passerby thought of us.  We decided that it was most logical that we were 3 inmates with our police escort getting our hour rec time.  Man, we are not model prisoners.....we took way longer than an hour!

At the top of hill number 412....gorgeous, but DAMN!

About mile 25, on our 537th hill of the day, we abandoned the running and opted for a power walk.  We started talking about how we got to our journeys as runners and how we were all so different than we were 15 years ago.  We started sharing really personal stories, and even though it was above 90, we all got shivers.  We agreed that we were so damned lucky to be where we were in life, and how running really helped us ground ourselves and be good friends, partners, and parents.  JD has two kids as well, and we gave Brad some solid, likely shitty parenting advice I'm sure he holds near and dear to his heart.  In this stretch we also developed a real craving for bacon cheeseburgers, gravy fries, calzones, a solid base of four letter words and "That's what She said" jokes.

In the heart of the country, we noticed an abundance of Trump signs and the talk turned to politics.  This could have gotten sketchy, but we were past any squeamishness (yes, we already resolved the "If a runner shits in the woods debate") and had a lively political chat.  We ended in agreement - clearly, it was time for Brad to cast his net into politics, and run for president.  We came up with a platform "He ran the county, now he can run the country!" and I'm pretty sure I volunteered to run the campaign while JD fed us and kept us up in dirty jokes.  Somehow, I have faith this will be fruitful, and you can all thank me in November.

Umbrella hat!

About mile 28, we encountered a new obstacle - there was construction on a bridge that led to a road closure about 12 feet long.  We had 3 choices.....jump it, run the detour (an extra 3 miles), or catch a ride to the other side of the bridge.  JD and I volunteered Brad to test the jump, and he wisely opted for the ride.  (See, he is smart).  We loaded to the other side of the road, and continued up another mother f*cking hill on our way.

About mile 30, Trina joined us again (at the top of a hill, cause she's super smart) and we entered dog country.  Devine gave us some siren support to stave off the ankle biters, and we (almost) unanimously decided JD could totally be our dog bait (Sorry, JD).  The next 5 miles were pretty uneventful - we stopped a few times, Brad was really hurting, and I was starting to hit a wall based off of the fact that I packed nowhere near enough food, no electrolytes, and nowhere near enough liquid for the day.  Thankfully, Steph shared water and ice, and I shared my trick of how to go from a B cup to a D cup with just a handful of ice (its a cool party trick).

About mile 35 we had some new people join us - our pom pom crew, Steph's mom, Sue (who had knee issues and was out there gettin it done!) and Tom, who brought fresh dirty jokes to our crew.  My gamin gave out at mile 36, and JD volunteered his stats for the cause (which were way better because my watch consistently shorted us.  Damned garmin).

It was about 6:30pm at this point and every time we thought the sun was done, it would prove it was kidding and give off more heat.  The bugs came out and the hills were relentless.  The ground was mostly rocks and dirt, and I got really thirsty.  Trina and I paired up and came up with a few awesome running plans - I think I agreed to coach her and JD and pace them for a half in the fall (I am so in, guys!) and we traded more life stories, which was much needed!

About mile 38, I took a break.  I was getting cold and fuzzy headed, which is never a good thing.  I hadn't peed in 5 hours.  I took a break in Steph's car, slammed a gatorade, and looked down to see my legs were totally covered in heat rash.  It was still in the high 80s, and about 7:30pm.  I could not warm up and knew I was in trouble.  I took over as support with Steph via tunage, and we came up with a playlist to finish out the day - including epic jams like "Till I Collapse" and "The Hills" (I knew I liked this girls sense of humor).  I eventually rallied and can't thank Steph enough for her awesome support of the silly runner who didn't prep (Of course, in my defense, I DID plan to run 21, not 42!).  The last few miles Brad decided not to stop at all and the crew maintained a strong as hell pace of 16-17 minute miles (with JD in charge of splits!) power walk, even breaking into a jog for the last half mile.  According to JD's timekeeping, we finished the second 21 miles in 5:35, for a 16:00 pace.

Total elevation gain over 42 miles:  3600 feet.  Un freaking real. For comparison, the 112 mile Lake Placid Elevation gain for the bike IN TH ADIRONDACKS is about 6000 feet.

Cause why not bunny ears at mile what the hell ever.

The end was filled with air hugs, fist bumps, exchange of phone numbers, and a ride back to the car (still craving that cheeseburger).  I was exhausted, dirty, and my neck was sore as hell.  My legs were covered in heat rash, and I ate a bag of tortilla chips for dinner (those babies were so darn good), along with some gourmet McD's burgers.

The next day, after fueling up well, I felt pretty awesome.  Brad finished his last 14 miles strong Saturday and met his goal.  I woke up to so many kind words and group camaraderie from my new Cat county peeps - and the feeling of being part of something so much bigger than I was.  The whole day was beyond anything I could have even imagined.  In today's world, especially with the events of 2020, to be part of something like this was exactly what I needed.

 Brad asked me to pace him, and he and his support crew and family gave me more than I ever could have given them.  I had a bunch of new Facebook friends, I might be in someone's wedding (kidding...maybe??) and I think I might have spring boarded my future as a  running coach. 

  I met so many amazing people over the miles - Misty, Althea, Chris, Trina, JD, Trae, Teegan, Shane, Deena, Sue, Tom, "D" Devine, Deb, and of course Steph - and the man him self.  (Sorry if I missed anyone!) He might be Forrest Gump.  He might be a personal coach.  He might be a runner.  But above all things, he is a warrior who goes for what he believes in and what he sets out to do - as an example to others of the lack of limits living with CF - and to a daily example to everyone of living life without limits.

How inspiring.  How amazing.  How.....I have no words.  Brad, I won't forget this day ever.  Thank you for inviting me into your world. It meant so much to me.

And like you, I'll stride till I'm done.

Please donate to his cause - https://passion.cff.org/runforacure.  His goal is 100,000 and he is halfway there (no I won't sing more Bon Jovi).  In a year where we need a "why" - here it is.

(Note: Thanks to Deb Golley for the awesome pics!)

(Note:  Five days post run, I feel awesome - I took a few days off and am back to running again, though a slow build up for sure!  I DO NOT advise doing what I did - I had one 18 miler build up to this day and drastically screwed up my nutrition and hydration.  I was able to fix it on the fly with no long term damage but it was not a wise way to handle this. Also note, all decisions were my own and not my coaches - due to 2020 being lame AF, I am on pause with my coach and all stupid decisions are mine alone.  He would, um, strongly advise against this, period.  )

Power Up - Rob is 7!!!

You guys.  Every year I say it, and every year it gets a little wilder.  Where does the time go???  I can't believe my little baby is seven years old.  SEVEN.  I kindly asked him to stop it, please, and he told me "Mommy, I can't.  It's what people do - we grow up!".  Alright, kid.  Point made.  I don't like it much, but as we do, we roll with the awesome parts of your little kid not being so little any more and cherish the fleeting times that are passing way too quickly for this mama!

And you made it, buddy.  The big seven.  This year has been a year of ups and downs (mostly ups!) and some mega changes!  A big move, your first mile race, being six during a pandemic, and making some pretty awesome new friends while keeping your nearest and dearest friendships alive in a whole new world!  As always, it's a time for this mama to not only look back on the last year, but also to take a trip down memory lane to when Rob was born...One...Two...Three...Four.......five....six...

And now he's 7!  So let's talk about the man of the hour....the ROB MAN!

Size: 49 pounds, four feet tall even.  Right where you should be dude!!  You have a fantastic appetite and definitely are a mover and shaker - you are growing up so beautifully and well!  Our main worry is to always make sure you are eating enough for your constant GO GO GO!  

Likes: Some things never change - though you don't obsess the way you used to, you still love your cars....instead of the matchbox variety you now have a thing for cool classic and muscle cars.  You point them out whenever we go out for a ride and have decided that our new 3 car garage is a perfect place to store your new lambo.  Sure, buddy.  I'll get right on it.  (That could be a hot wheels, right??).  You still love science, and have been loving physics and astronomy lately - we busted out our telescope and love the night sky!!  You still love swimming and biking and ADORE running - you go out with mommy at least once a week to log the miles and are getting so darn fast!!

You love your video games and really got into Minecraft this year, and the most recent obsession is Mario Kart and Smash Bros...you have a Mario costume you dress up in and go to town on your Nintendo Switch!

You still love dance parties and can really bust a move, and you're getting into strategic gaming - whether it be in real life or on the X box.  Watching your mind put moves together is just amazing, buddy - I love the way your process and the awesome conclusions you come to!

Dislikes: Art - coloring, projects, etc...not a fan.  You've started to draw and create characters, and you are pretty darn good at it - but its on your own terms, which is cool.  You have a love/hate relationship with your sister, which is totes normal, though I will say being with her 24/7 the last few months has definitely made you closer!  You still have doubts about school but our recent move to Webster has been eye opening and you loved your teacher for the few weeks that you had her.  I'm hopeful if we return in the fall that we can make school into something you love and look forward to!

Sleep: While this has never been your forte, we seem to be doing better with this one!  You have some nights that are tough and are still prone to nightmares, but more nights than not you sleep through the night.  I'm hopeful this trend continues!

Eating: You still eat all the things!!  This year yous tarted to learn about nutrition at school and are pretty intent on following a balanced diet - you ask me all the time if a certain food is healthy and if it has too much sugar.  It's been a great lesson in moderation for our whole family and we have learned to balance our favorite treats - pizza, chicken nuggets, hash browns and hot dogs - with carrots, broccoli, yogurt, and fresh fruit.  Your favorite food is APPLES and you have at least one a day and would probably eat four if Mommy could stock them fast enough!  This is your dessert every night and you could teach mommy a things or two, buddy!  Way to go!!

Milestones/Firsts: First mile race last Fall - you learned you love to run long but have to control speed!  You're learning that if you go out too hard you end up using all you have in the tank.  I'm impressed - it took Mommy about 30 more years to realize this!!  You also lost your first tooth!!  When asked what you wanted the tooth fairy to bring you, you responded..."A Dime".  (Love you kid!!)  You made the big move to Webster.  Started a whole new school...for 3 weeks.  Learned how to kick some ass in first grade via distance learning, and did amazing at it!  You are reading at close to a 3rd grade level and your science grasp is off the charts.  We are so, so proud!


You keep learning more Spanish bit by bit and also have picked up on a new language...profanity.  Uhhh....can I blame Daddy?  No?  Alright fine.  (steps back slowly).

Best Moment: Every single day, buddy.  I've said it before and I'll say it again - watching you grow up and learn new things every day is the best experience ever.  I see your wonder, your excitement, and yes, frustration as you navigate new things and understand the world around you better every day (kudos to you kid, the world is a giant mystery to me right now!)  You are in the coolest spot right now - you are growing up from a little kid to a boy that's not mommy's little guy anymore, even though you still humor me from time to time.  You assure me that you will always give Mommy hugs, 'mooches and snuggles and will never, ever, get too big for that.  I'm gonna hold you to it dude - watching you grow is beyond amazing, but from time to time I get the Mom sniffles and remember when you curled right up and fit in my lap and slept there....my little peanut.  I remember when you relied on me for every thing and when you tell me "Mom, I got it.  Let me do it" I am simultaneoously so excited for you growing up and also nostaglicly tearful as I know...you don't need me like you used to.  It's every parents catch-22, buddy.  We love you so much and it';s our job to help you grow up then let you go.  I know it.  But it's not easy.  

Looking Forward To: Our summer together - we have no idea what this looks like in the "Brave New World" of 2020, but we sure are making memories every day and making the best of it!  We swim, we play catch, tag, ride bikes, eat donuts for dinner, and take life right as it comes to us!  In a year where we don't know what "big moments" will come our way, we sure are loving all the Little Wonders (Google it - It's a Rob Thomas song that will totally make you cry when you have kiddos!)

I love you so much buddy.  As always, I remember every single day how very lucky I am to be your mommy and that I was trusted with the most important job in the world!!