Sunday, February 12, 2017

You Can't Handle The Truth.

There are certain inevitable facts of life.  1:  The month of January, unless you have a birthday or an anniversary, is one of the lamest months around.  2:  With the crappy weather, new POTUS mess, and massive flu/sickness epidemic, January 2017 is on record, one of the crappiest January's ever.  3:  The Glaser household has been triply effected - Greg has pneumonia, Biz and Rob caught colds, and collectively, we have unfollowed about 50 people on facebook for increasingly head shaking insane posts about politics.  4:  As a result, I have been MIA from blogging - sickness and the increasing dislike of social media.
I have to say, in all honesty, I really haven't missed it.  I used to like sharing my thoughts on life, parenting, and running, along with an errant recipe or two.  And I could blame it on lack of time - I've been basically the parent for the last two weeks in our home, so it would be true.  But the real fact is, 2017 has just been a sucky year all around, and I'm highly unmotivated.
I won't get into politics, because its just a black hole.  I can sum it up in about one sentence and just say that I am just not proud to be an American lately (Sorry, Lee Greenwood).  I'm not proud of the new administration, and I'm not proud of those that oppose it.  With very few exceptions, most adults I know are acting less intelligently and tolerant than my toddler (and no, I don't mean Rob).  It's sad.  It's scary.  And it's done more to shut up my feelings of freedom of speech than I care to admit.  I thank my lucky stars, every day, that Greg and I can have a serious, non judgmental discussion about the state of the world.  Because I can't even count the number of times a friend has engaged me in conversation or vice versa and I've been totally judged on my thoughts.  The inability to have a debate and walk away with a new understanding and respect on both sides is not a theme in 2016/2017.  And that makes me sad.  I'm not sure what to do about it.  But it's a contributing factor of 2017 sucking.
The sickness.  I am so not down with it (and I need to quit quoting songs, I know, it's disturbing :-P).  It's just been a shit month, healthwise.  I am the only healthy member of our household (crossing crossables), which is good and bad.  Good in the fact that someone can function...bad that I am exhausted.  It's super frustrating to both Greg and I, and the kids are beyond stir crazy.  We all need a break.  Anyone offering a free vacation to the Bahamas? :-D
Lastly, I've been super struggling with workouts.  Greg and I are trying to plan our race calendar, but having little success.  First of all, he's sick and can't do much, which makes it tough to get excited about racing.  Second, our favorite tri, Sodus, has been cancelled indefinitely.  This was our first tri in 2005, and we have done it every year (I even did it virtually in 2015!) so it's a massive bummer to see it go.  I understand the business decision, but sentimentally, it sucks.  It's very strange to know it'll be the first year we won't be there!  Lastly, I am floundering without a real goal.  I heard that post Ironman blues were real in 2010, but I never felt them.  I signed up for another....then tried to break 4, then got pregnant....times two.  But I had two major PR's in 2016, and I am now done with babies (which, don't get me started) so...now what?  I have the vague goal of hitting 1:45 in the half, but it's not exciting me.  I'm not sure I want to go long, Ironman isn't feasible with two toddlers (IMO) and I'm not at a spot to BQ (take 20 minutes off my new marathon PR).  So, now what?
And those 3 words pretty much sum up my 2017 experience so far.  So....now what?  I don't know.  I do know it's not my style to wallow for long, so pretty soon we will all get healthy, I'll stop running the same damn 7 miles on the treadmill, and 'murica will take a turn (I hope!).  But for now....it is what it is.  And, no, I'm no sure I CAN handle that truth.
But I'm here.  Just wanted to let you know that.  I haven't thrown it in.  I promise!