IMTX: Pre Race/Swim - Beautiful Day

Well, it's a week out, and life is finally starting to get back to "normal".  I'm not sure what to call that since, honestly, none of what happened last weekend has really sunk in and its been completely surreal -  in terms of the race, the support, the post race events, and being back home.  Nonetheless, I'm back, walking "relatively well", and ready to share the nitty gritty! This will be a 3-parter, because who can tell an Ironman in one blog post (this is for you, Barry).  So, for all the rest of you that enjoy my navel gazing (you do too, Barry :-P), lets kick it off with a little pre race/swim story!

So, as many of you know, the week leading up to departure was quite frankly, a shit show.  My bike didn't work, travel plans were up in the air, and I second guessed everything, including even racing (I'll always admit it when I fumble).  Of course, as life normally does, some of this shook out and some did not.  With two days to go, I had my sherpa lined up and it was Greg - which was awesome, because if anyone gets Ironman, he does.  My bike was playing nice, I had a great send off to the party on my last swim (I have the best friends), and all travel plans were falling into place - thank goodness.  The drive down to Texas was uneventful, save for our Air Bnb Cancelling about 800 miles into the trip at 9pm - for the next night (OMG), so I guess it was...eventful!  This was pretty horrific, and after the initial freak out, I reminded myself that Ironman was fraught with this stuff  - the unexpected- and got out my fix it box.  We ended up with a place to stay that was affordable, and about 15 minutes away from the race, which was not the ideal half mile from the finish I booked 8 months ago, but absolutely much better than it could have been.

The pre race days featured all the fun it usually is - getting acclimated from mid 40s weather to mid 80s with humidity (yay for early season races!), shaking out some last minute bike shit (my bike seems to have a thing for the small chain ring ALL the time - this dude and I are gonna have to talk or it will not work out) and the usual array of things you need to do pre race.  Check in was awesome - apparently my AWA status lent me "super privileges" with a no line check in (I felt like a douche, tbh) a low number - which was also a cool number - 247 - 24/7 baby! I never thought that would matter but with it came awesome racking - right behind the pros - so it was much less to run with my bike.  I'm still not sure I'm cool enough to be AWA, but if they are fooled, I'm gonna roll with it.

I met some new besties at check in - Lynne from Ohio, who was there with her husband working on her legacy qualifier to do Kona in 2023, and Lisa from Texas, who raced Iowa last year - and we had fun commiserating on that race!  We all went to the briefing together, the pre race banquet, and were racked next to each other - which was awesome!  Both women were super sweet and we are now bonded via text and social media forever, as most race friendships go - and I love it.

The day before the race I did a dip in the lake  - which was about as gross as advertised, but hey, I swam in the Hudson, so who am I to talk -  and fixed the damned bike again, which was giving me shit.  At this point, the race nerves had subsided and I was starting to question how I was going to do anything fast or long the next day, which is about normal at this point, but still, always a mind job.  I had been pretty vocal about this whole Kona goal (which even netted me a spot on the Ironman video - woot!) but not many people knew my time goals - I was hoping at least for a sub 12, which would have easily gotten me to Kona from last years results.  My real goal was an 11:30, where I could make the math work  - a 1:10-1:15 swim, 5:45-5:55 bike, 4:00 hour run, and fifteen minutes for transitions.  This worked out to about 11:15-11:25, with fudge factor.  The numbers looked UNREAL to me, but Mean Dude was on board with all of them, and predicted a faster swim to boot. 

I racked my bike early, got my stuff together, and got my feet up  - I had slept like crap the last few days due to travel, etc. and was passed out by 7pm. The amount of love I got the night before blew me away - I'm not sure if it was the story telling I have done so far, my public announcement of these "big scary goals" (oh yeah I went there), or the fact that I might have self depreciating humor nailed - but man, you guys are amazing.  I have said it before and I'll say it again - the support I have had for this race from my friends and in general has blown me away - and I am so grateful for it.  I fell asleep with a smile on my face and woke up, full of nervous energy at 2:30am.

Since my alarm was set for 3am, there was little point in going back to sleep.  I started out with the BEST part of my day - REAL. FREAKING. COFFEE.  OMG.  Heaven in a cup. ITS NOT DECAF!!  LOL.  I was strangely calm the morning of - went through my pre race routine with plenty of time to spare.  The beauty of Ironman is that you are constantly re packing yourself into a smaller box - you start out at home with everything you need to pack for the day, which is a shit ton.  Then you usually travel where you need lodging - so everything you need goes in a car (if you're me) or a plane (if you're sane).  Then you do bag and bike check in the day before - so anything that isn't nutrition or electronics is already at the venue.  Race morning, you top off your electronics, mix your nutrition, and don your kit.  I was already sunscreened up, aquaphored up, and ready to test out my new Raise kit - and by 4:30, we were out the door and ready to go!

Pre race, I topped off my tires, rented out my bike pump for $5 per person and made a million dollars lent my bike pump to a bunch of athletes, added my electronics and nutrition to my bike, and was ready to go!  Lynne and Lisa and I hammed it up for the camera, and we went off in search of Joel, Lisa's husband, to make our trek to the swim start.  I paid special attention to topping off my breakfast, smiled at the early morning texts I got (at 5am on a Saturday, you guys are troopers!) and before I knew it, it was time to head to the corrals.  Greg wished me luck and went off to do his sherpa thing - he planned to watch the swim, go home for the bike (a wise move!) then cheer me on for the run!  

I lined up with the 1:00-1:10 swimmers, per Mean Dude - the water was 72, wetsuit legal, which never happens for Texas!  The day was forecasted to be low 80s, with wind on the bike, but nowhere near last year (it got up to about 20mph, but that's a bike story).  Again, I was pretty calm.  It didn't seem real.  My training was solid - but with the edges of taper, as well as the life craziness it brought, the bulk of the training seemed to be such a distant memory.  Was I ready?  Could I do this?  Time would tell. 

 As I took a deep breath, U2's "Beautiful Day" came over the speakers, and I smiled.  It was going to be such a beautiful day - and I was going to spend it doing everything I loved.  How lucky was I?  All the shit leading up to the race - the early mornings, the cold, the heartache, the pain - it was all worth it.  The smiles and friendships and cheering made it worth it.  The ability to move my body and smile as I took in some amazing sights - this was worth it.  I freaking LOVE this sport and the journey was absolutely worth every single second. I smiled about the last year - and how much it has brought me - again, if you told me I was legit vying for a Kona slot even a year ago, I would have laughed at you.  Life is wild, messy, unpredictable and absolutely amazing. Today was THE day.  To give it everything I had and see what happened!  With a smile, I moved forward in the queue, and ran into the water, ready to play triathlon!!

The first mile or so was pretty uneventful, as I got into a comfortable rhythm.  I had seeded myself well, and while I couldn't find feet to follow, I wasn't fighting with anyone either.  I breathed deeply, took it easy, and reminded myself to burn no matches on the swim.  This changed as we turned the first corner and the sun was in our face - there were no real waves, but the swim back to the canal was a little bit tougher as it seemed we had a slight current on the way out.  I got into the scrum a bit here, as people were getting congested, and there was a decent amount of physical contact.  One dude got super personal with me (he never even gave me his number, the bastard) and as I worked my way to the outside, I got kicked square in the face and my goggles came off.  Shit.  I had the presence of mind to grab them and flip on my back, and blew bubbles for a minute to get them on right, and was off.  Again, that's Ironman.  Its such a long day that you have to be ready for this shit.  Thankfully I was fine - and aside from a minute of off-kilter, I was back on track.  

After about a zillion years 3000 meters, we hit the canal, which was much easier to sight, but got more congested as we went.  I was doing my chill swim thing (maybe I will learn how to race in the water someday!) when I breathed left and saw - GREG!  OMG!  He found me in the water!  He was videoing, and of course, because I am #superserious, I waved.  And laughed.  How much fun - and how crazy he found me! 

The rest of the swim passed rather uneventfully - I peed in my wetsuit (aren't you glad you know this about me), flutter kicked a bit more to get my leggoes ready, and before I knew it, I was out of the water in 1:14.  I had honestly wanted a bit closer to 1:10, but after the race, it seemed everyone's swim times, including the pros (and wizard Lauren Brandon) were a bit long.  My Garmin netted 4250 yards, which is about 100 yards long for a standard Ironman swim - which was not bad at all, especially for an April race, where I have OWS exactly 2500 yards total in training.   While I have "learn how to swim" on my list for my next race (I set lofty goals, man!) - I was totally fine with the few minutes I lost here, and plopped my butt down for the wetsuit strippers peelers, and was off to my bike for the ride!!

Side note - this screenshot is from a video a spectator posted during the swim Saturday- including a PILE of 6 foot long nope ropes right by the canal....and one slithering in DURING THE RACE.  If someone showed this to me prior to the swim, I either would have had a coronary or swam a freaking record Ironman swim.  Race plan for the next one?  HELL TO THE NO!

Stay tuned for part 2..... :)

IMTX Taper/Reflections: Unstoppable

And, after four months of training, eight months since I hit "submit" and ten months since I crossed the last Ironman finish line, its here.  Race week.  The day after tomorrow is the big two (okay, three) step - Ironman Texas.  So much has happened in the last three weeks and as I look at the bigger picture that its pretty much impossible to sum it up, but I'm gonna try.

The taper, as expected, was a giant shit show.  They always are.  I had the standard loss of energy,
coupled with lack of caffeine (OMG this was the worst part!), and then added in a dash of equipment problems - thank goodness for the heat wave in NY that let me get out on my bike.  I had issues with my chain dropping (limiter adjustment), issues with my power meter (it went from 0-13000 watts in 30 seconds, and no, I am not that good) and I was averaging about 2 mph less on every ride than I should.  Which, for the mind job of taper, OMG.  After four rides and a serious reconsideration of race goals - turns out my saddle has shifted back a half inch and down.  Welp, that'll do it.  FINALLY, my last brick fell into place before leaving NY - whew. I also had some foot issues stemming from new shoes, which is finally resolved.  Gotta love the last few weeks of this stuff!!

With that in check, my personal life also turned to shit AGAIN, with more ups and downs than I have space to talk about here.  The skinny is - a few roller coaster announcements that threw me for a loop (see what I did there), a pretty massive shake up with an existing friendship, and with 3 days left until departure - I had no idea who was even going with me to Texas. (Note that I have some amazing people that offered and I thank you.  While I have spent the last 4 months in such a weird shift of places, I have had one constant - and thats my tribe.  I love you guys).  Thankfully, it all got sorted, and with a fun new twist on my way out the door that's made me smile most of this week (thank you for that vague blogging Rae, you suck).

FINALLY on the road and somewhere around Cincinatti, our Air BnB cancelled.  WTF.  Again, a deep breath and a few hours of phone calls and frantic searches, and that got settled.  With past reflection, I am glad everything has worked out as it should, but I sincerely hope the drama is done until after Saturday!!  It reminds me that you just never know with Ironman - I've been pretty up front this time around with the whole process - both in a "this is how it is" with a twist of humor.  Ironman....is freaking hard.  It does not go to plan.  It demands a ton of work and discipline and is un-sexy.  And its always WHEN - not IF - something will go wrong.  You have to be able to handle it, and move on. But damn - is it fun.  And despite all of the craziness it brings, I am so grateful and happy to be doing something I love so freaking much. 

And if that isnt a microcosm for the last ten months of my life, I dont know what is.  I have changed so much since toeing the line of IMDSM in June 2022.  Some record highs, and some record lows.  And this past stint of training has taught me so damned much about who I am both on and off the race course.  I can't say it was all fun.  To be very honest, 2023 to date has hands down been the most challenging year of my life.  I have never cried as much as I have this year.  I have never hurt so much.  I have never, ever, been faced with so many things that are just giant question marks or unknowns where I have no idea which first step to take. And so, as I always do, I take the first step.  Sometimes its shaky, sometimes its right, and sometimes its jumping off a cliff.  And thats life. 

And I hesitate to write it, but its the truth.  At the gym in early January, I finished one of my 5am swims and as I walked into the locker room, Sia's "Unstoppable" played through the speakers.  We all know the lyrics - I'm unstoppable - I'm a porsche with no breaks - and you inevitably feel the power of this unstoppable woman. And as I drove home and relistened to the song, I heard the different lyrics I never noted.....

"I'll smile I know what it takes to fool this town"

"Ill tell what you wanna hear, leave my sunglasses on while I shed a tear"

"Breakdown, only alone I will cry out loud, you'll never see whats hiding out"

"I'll put my armor on to show you how strong I am"

And I cried.  Because this...was me.  And in the last 3 months....I've been unstoppable...on the outside.   I've cried on the inside and to those few close people I trust.  To everyone else - I'm invinsible.  I'm confident.  I'm unstoppable. Working through the hurt for some accomplishment has been the most productive way I know to channel it - to bring some positive to all the challenges that aren't.  And while it doesn't fix everything, the genuine love I have for this sport has absolutely helped a ton, along with those people that see through my armor and sunglasses - and have been there for me every single step of the way.

And on Saturday, I'll be thinking about those amazing people that helped me get here - and continue to show me such amazing love with whatever capacity they have to do it.  I'm doing it with the support of an amazing coach and some absolutely wonderful friends and family that I could never imagine the past few months without.

And as I think about it - its the essence of Ironman.  It somehow strips you raw and demands of you -
what are you made of?  Can you shed a tear then pull yourself up and go after what you want - even if it means a 4am wakeup?  If it means training through tears?  If it means being frozen, too hot, running after 19 hours in a car, or when your entire life is falling apart?

I can.  And while I hate one of the reasons it went so well - the respite of training when your heart hurts so much that pushing through the pain seems a much lesser evil - its not the whole essence.  It's also a time of change in my life - and I know this.  And right before that change is when its the hardest - when you have to look at where you are, where you want to be, and who is there next to you.

I don't have all the answers, but I'm grateful for each day that I get to wake up and do what I love, be with the people I love, and take a deep breath and look up at the gorgeous sky and say "Thank you".  And then....dive into a pool.  A Lake.  Ride my beautiful bike.  Or lace up my shoes and go for a run.

Ironman Texas is....a race.  But it's also the culmination of some pretty sweet work, some pretty hard days, and the finish line of chasing my best self.  Let's get it started!!

IMTX Block 4: Tick Tick Boom

And in the blink of an eye, it's almost done.  Block 4 and the final block before taper ended Sunday - again, this was a 3 week block with two weeks of Peak Volume followed by a week of recovery, where once again, life took a turn and smacked my recovery straight in the face (what, its not wise to drive 24 hours in 3 days, most of it overnight?)  Oh I kill myself.  But I'm getting ahead of the story.  Lets talk about this peak week crap, otherwise known as "Where Mean Dude Tried to Kill me" (It didn't work.  Hah).

The concept of peak weeks aren't new to me - its pretty typical that in the span of Ironman training that there will be a few weeks of ridiculous volume about a month out from race day, and this was no exception.  The volume for my max weeks averaged 21-23 hours each week, with a few key long ass workouts - namely, a 6 hour ride followed by an hour run, a 20 mile run, and a 4000 yd straight swim (okay swimmers, you can stop shuddering - we do this exactly once to just fucking do it.)  The rest of the build was just adding on to other workouts, and mounting that fatigue.  The key here was to set those three workouts up so that I was ready to rock it with both the nutrition aspect and also get an idea as to my numbers for race day.

As expected, we prepped as well as humanly possible and dealt with the shit when it happened.  Globally, I set up the two weeks in advance for life by doing a lot of meal prep, scheduling playdates for the kids (I have the best Mom friends!) and accepting quite a few early wake ups, ranging from 3am on.  Ironman is not glamourous by any stretch, and there is a time to dig deep and ask how much you want it....and I really, really do.  My favorite lifeguard at the Y helped me out here - during week two, when I was seriously dragging at the pool, he chatted me up and we were discussing my likelihood of survival.  Flippantly, I told him this was just "an experiment with thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours to see what I get out of it - NBD" and he looked me dead in the eye at 5:45am and asked "Like a trip to Hawaii?  How bad do you want it?"  Answer - Pretty fucking badly.  The desire to go to Kona is strong here, folks.  I'm fully aware its a crapshoot on the day and that anything can happen, but the laser focus is all there and I plan to throw  everything i have at this goal., 

In terms of execution, the two week span brought much of what you would expect - some successes and some "character building".

The Swim - As luck would have it, the heater at the Y was on the fritz during this span, which meant that a few swims I did - the water was in the upper 80s.  Holy hell.  I appreciated the nod to the tropics, but sadly, they do not allow margaritas on deck, so I absolutely muscled through some of these sets as well as I could, adjusting for conditions.  And while it sucked, that's about right - I don't expect the water to be mid 80s in Texas, but the day will absolutely bring something unexpected, so we roll.  My big swim went well, and I felt pretty good about that - I have a pretty accurate read on what I can expect to do on race day, which was the goal.  I am by no means a swimmer, but I get the job done with not a ton of effort, so we have held on to that this cycle and I feel good about it.

The Bike - Man, I'll tell you. I have been feeling pretty good on the bike - but its always a tough thing, because the weather this time of year is just not conducive to riding outside.  I got a few short shivery rides in, but most of my riding was still indoors this time around.  There were a few 3am wakeups to get it in, and two long rides - 5.5 hours and 6 hours, where I posted a few questionable videos and Mean Dude debated checking me into an asylum (to be fair, he thinks that a lot and I don't blame him).  With the being said, all long rides were successful  - I have my nutrition dialed in and my plan for the day.  A few issues popped up here - my HRM died, and so we learned how to go off watts and RPE - I ordered a new one, but it was a good reminder that shit can happen race day and that backup metrics are a good idea.  (I have never been through an Ironman where all my tech worked, so if this is the time it craps the bed, I am happy about it!)

The Run - Well, you guys know this is my fave, and there was no exception.  I had a little snafu during week one, when my long run was split - 9 in the morning and 10 in the afternoon.  I'm fully aware of the logic of this, but my body did not respond well at all.  I hit the run goal, but felt like I got run over by a bus afterwards.  Happily, my runs off the long bike were spot on - with the help of Laura, my amazing neighbor and fast becoming bestie, who does a great job of letting me cry with a side of "Get in loser, we are running" to remind me what my goals are and that I'm a tough bitch.  God I love her.  My last long run - a 20 miler, was absolutely perfect - I had no HRM so went off RPE and hit the pace beautifully.  I haven't spent a lot of time here talking about numbers, but the fact that my 20 mile training run was at a faster pace than my last marathon PR pace was awesome - on day 13 of peak efforts.  Suffice to say, unless its a zillion degrees on race day, I feel good about the run!

All that other stuff - Is what it is.  At some point, I will stop being surprised at the wild curveballs life throws me, but again, the past four months have included zero of what I expected, in terms of sport, life, and family and friends.  I'm positive I will write some ridiculous navel gazing post while I am tapering (get excited) but for now, as I am so damned tired and in need of looking at the positives...I'm highly focused on being so incredibly grateful for the people that have been in my corner this go around - of course, my coach, who really is the opposite of mean (except when he forces me into zone 2 at hour 5 of a long ride), my swimmy friend Bear, who again, brought me a survival care package during my most stressful peak week (I LOVE YOU!), my runny friend Laura (waxed poetic about above) who has just been there for me for everything - as someone who is used to just getting it done, the idea that I have such an amazing friend to check in and also get my butt moving during a tempo run is beyond amazing - AND she does cheesecake deliveries! My friend Billy who just lets me cry and listens to my endless sob stories without judgement, and, of course, my neighbor Kelly, who takes my kids, feeds me Costco chicken, and lets me collapse in her backyard post workout failure and cry like a little kid.

It's again, amazing what life brings you when you need it most.  And as I pen this, I am admittedly three days into taper and giving up caffeine, so I might not have all my devices - but I do know that while Ironman is a solo sport....I could never do it without my tribe.  And if you asked me 6 months ago who that tribe would be....I never would have known it to be most of these people.  I love you guys.  So much. You have no idea how much you mean to me. 

Ten days out from IMTX.....what's left?  No caffeine (screw you mean dude). Five days left of NY, then a long road trip to TEXAS and taking on Ironman #5 - I CANNOT WAIT! Next update to come from the Lonestar state - stay tuned!