Cheerleader

 Wow.  Just...wow.  Sometimes you sit down and put things into the ether and wonder...is there anyone out there actually reading?  Does this mean anything to anyone? 

And yes....yes, you are.  The amount of responses I've gotten via text, Facebook, and phone about my last post are...staggering.  And they really come down to two main camps:

1.  Girl, are you ok???  Let's talk.  Sorry I've been so busy dealing with my own seven million things - I'm there.  Let's go sledding, have a glass of wine or scream together in an open field.  

2.  Girl....same.  Same.  Luisa was made to make us realize that we ALL are going through this shit - we are all completely overwhelmed and no, it's not all sunshine and rainbows.  This shit is HARD.  And I'm also struggling, too.

For those of you in camp 1 - I love you guys.  Really, I do.  I'm not jumping off a bridge and even though I'm totally overwhelmed with life, this was not a cry for help.  It was an honest assessment of where I'm at and, quite frankly, the necessary prerequisite for some much needed change in my life.  This is where it starts.  And I would LOVE to catch up on the phone (yes, even though I jest, I do talk on the phone), go play in the snow, or have a beer.  I also want to hear about YOU, give YOU a hug, and remember how even in all the mess of the world right now that we have each other.  Even though its been days, months or even years, we do have each other. 

For those of you in camp 2 - I feel ya.  Really, I do. I'm aware that as the requisite shit poster on Facebook, all you ever see from me are crazy memes, kiddo pics, and annoying posts on how I went out and did so many damned miles at o crazy time.  It's easy to assume that I have all my shit together and this post was also meant to show that...I don't.  It's easy to post things through rose colored glasses or goofy things but - I don't have it all together.  And...it's ok if you don't either.  Let's lean on each other and have that drink, throw snowballs, or help each other out when we can.  This shit is HARD.  We are stressed, we are overwhelmed, and I am here if you need me.  I love you!

Either way, its given me plenty of food for thought about mental health and the idea of cheerleaders.  I mentioned it last post, and I'll say it again - especially right now, we all need them. Cheerleaders.  Possibly the males reading this post are envisioning cute little skirts and hey, whatever floats your boat - but for the rest of us, what I mean is...someone that encourages you, supports you, and wants you to succeed. 

I used to go through life just assuming everyone was in my corner - now that I'm a bit older (perhaps not that much wiser TBH) I realize that's not necessarily the case.  But I also am learning that I really do have those special cheerleaders out there that really, really want to see me succeed.  Some of them show up when I least expect it, some are there when I really am ready to throw in the towel, and some of them are always quietly there for me.

They are special people.  For the longest time, I also felt like I had to be a cheerleader for them as well.  And as I continue to go through this crazy rollercoaster, I'm learning that that isn't always true either - there are some people that cheer me on and are there for me that have their own cheerleaders or don't need that from me in our relationship.  Likewise, I have some excellent friends that I am a cheerleader for that I don't go to when the goin' gets rough.  They are such fantastic people in so many other areas of my life and are EXCELLENT friends, but that's not their role in my life.

And that's ok.  Any great relationship is never going to be equal on all fronts - as long as it balances out with the give and take in the end and you both feel like your life is better for having them in it - that's phenomenal.  Sometimes they evolve and those relationships are kept, and sometimes they dissipate as the world changes and we change.  

Either way, especially right now - when we are all feeling so much, so much of the time, and it's hard to see out of it - give yourself grace.  And deep breaths.  And even as someone that's feeling that surface pressure so hard core right now - I know - we WILL get through this. Even if it doesn't look like we thought it would, or we come out the other end a little bit different (which, to be honest, isn't always a bad thing) we will. 

And I'm here for you.  Truly.  I'm sending out love, hugs and that invitation for coffee, wine, beer, runs, or a hug.  I love you all.